Big love, best friend

France, night

I had a very very tough day today. This morning began with an hour and half at the dentist (and the dentist is normally never too pleasant), to which it followed a busy afternoon in which I tried to organize all the things I needed to change apartment (stop the electricity here, open it for the new place, stop internet here, open it for the new place, stop the insurance on the apartment here, start it for the new place, etc etc etc). By 5pm this afternoon I was so tired that I almost fall asleep on my bed (I took a day off to do all these things).

So, what I needed this evening was a nice relaxing girly movie. And I picked up the perfect one (I am normally a disaster in picking up random movies): Made of Honor. It was what I needed, light, funny, with a bit of tears and a happy ending. Just perfect! And of course, it made me thinking.

What happens when the person you love is also one of your best friend? it is scary and exciting at the same time. The olandesino was certainly one of my best friend before to be my boyfriend. I guess we always liked each other a lot, but we liked each others company even more to not wanting to see that ending too in case a romantic relationship would end. So, for long time, we just were very very close good friends. Till we realized that we could lie to ourselves as much as we wanted, but there was something more than just being good friends between us. The sad part of the story is that when a relationship is over and your exboyfriend is also one of your best friends, you don't only lose a boyfriend, but you lose someone who knows you well, someone who you know you can call at whatever time, someone who can be a friend even being your boyfriend. The olandesino and I, probably because we were good friends since the beginning, didn't break up in a bad way. It was just the right thing to do and we both agree on that. But I guess that we now both miss the friend that we represented for each other. And this is sad. I wish that one day, when a bit more time will be passed by, we will be able to be an important part of each other life again.

I guess that I am so much into my own world and I can have so many different faces that I may or may not want the other person to know, that for me to live a big love, the person I am with has also to be a very good friend of mine and vice versa. It just adds something more. But it is also very scary. It is scary to think that you may lose a big love and a best friend if something in the romantic relationship doesn't work the way it should.

But I keep believing in it. And I am also optimist that everything, giving it the right time, will fit into the right place.