summer cleaning

I am taking one week-10 days off from work. Let's call this time holidays, although it is more just time for myself. I need, at least once a year, some time to just chill out and put things in the right places in my life.

Where to do that? I decided to just come to Italy, to my mom's place, where I can always find a way to get a break from my normal life....which, to be honest is not very normal anyway....

First step, as soon as I get to my room, the one I had before moving out from Italy, about 10 years ago, I start opening all the closets and look for old things to trow or give away. Then I begin by organizing the rest of the things. It is a process that may take a few days, as after the clothing, there are the books, the magazines, etc. By doing that, I feel in some way like if something inside me is getting in order too. By the end of the process, I may have gotten ride of one or two things, as I am too attached to everything to easily trow or give things away. But it is mentally very helpful.

And maybe it is because I am approaching my 35 years and this time, age is hitting me. But I feel ready for some major "summary" of my life so far. I really thought I would have got a permanent position this year, which I didn't. And I don't think to be over that yet. It still bothers
me. But that it is not the only thing. I am trying to realize all the things that are not the way I wish they were in my life and that do not make me happy. And I hope to change or improve them.

I feel lucky in having a place where I can always hide, rest, feel very welcomed and loved any time I need.