Tuesday, June 7, 2011

La botte piena e la moglie ubriaca

This is another common Italian way of saying that indicates a person who wants it all. Like me right now. And not only right now, to be honest.
I just got back to Italy. Crazy how much I miss being there, with my family, my close friends that I know since I was little (or much younger anyway), my home town, the familiar things, the food I love. I know that I would get saturated of all these same things within a couple of days if I would live there, but when I am there for just a few days, it is never easy nor pleasant to leave.
It may sound very childish, but I do wish that I would have it all.
My family and my friends close to me, so that I could spend a proper normal time with them, without always having to rush.
My home town, which I truly, deeply, love because it is beautiful (too bad that I cannot say the same about the typical "Lucchese", the people of Lucca).
All the familiar things that make me feel immediately at home.
The hugs of my mom and my grandma.
The long beaches on which to walk in the evening, at the sunset.
The laughs.

Many years ago I took a decision, which was to leave Italy to try to do what I like as work. I have never regretted that decision, even now, even when things were very hard for me. I do what I like and I consider myself lucky for this possibility that I have. But my roots are important to me and there is not success in my work that can replace the emptiness given by not having my family and friends close to me to share things with them. I could try to go back, but in this moment of general economic crisis, there are not possibilities in Italy, especially considering that my job is not "commercially valuable".
My last ex-boyfriend often said that we should have tried to find a way to spend half of the year living where we had a job and the other half of the year in Lucca, where I am from. Maybe half of the year would have been too much, but some months every year would be ideal. My next job is much more flexible of what I have now, so maybe it will be possible to work for some months from abroad...with abroad meaning Italy or any other place where I would like to be. For now I have to slowly get back to my life here.....one step at the time....

PS. Fortunately I have The Big Bang Theory and Sex and the City episodes to watch....perfect cheer me up tools!

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